Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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