Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
