My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
someone get that fucking seahorse.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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