Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
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