He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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