Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
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