so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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