we're blogging at a bar
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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