Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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