is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Randomize