did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
