The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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