brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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