Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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