So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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