so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Randomize
