why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
