I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
