Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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