Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize