And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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