Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
