Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
