She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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