Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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