Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
