I bet he comes in French.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
