google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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