Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize