I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize
