Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
no you cant smoke seaweed
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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