Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
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