that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
