I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
