Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
