i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
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