I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize
