We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
