Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
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