I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Randomize
