She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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