Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
