People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
