Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Randomize
