i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize
