i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
