I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Sorry my hands just texted you
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
