this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
