6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
