i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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